i'll twist you till you break

This gentle - man...he was on the Amazing Race some time ago. I think he beat the bible a lot. Something or other about Jesus and have a blessed day...the whole show. He and this horrible horrible girl. Who equally quoted text and blessednesssssss. At any rate. I think he should beat a lot of other things. Always have.

Praise be.

Anyway, things..they're lookin up. These weeks seem to go by so slowly lately. And it's Friday which totally makes me want to piss myself with joy and happy. We found another roomie and I am totes excited about that. It generates a nicer quality of life for us, not necessary, but ancillary.

I also earned some extra casheesh today, which will do nicely for a new pair of sneakers for running. I am totes going to get on the running thing, and at the same time try to keep the bulk I've got now. Which will be hard, but worth the try.

You's all like Lisa Loeb? I love her. I really do. I miss her. She ain't got no new stuff really. Nor do i think she will in the near future, sorta underused i think. Anyway, she's on my docking station for the pod today.

Well take care boys. Have a fun. (this comes from one of my old bosses, she was Asian, and would always say "Have a fun"....which would be used when we would leave work on a Friday...instead of have a good weekend......or have a fun weekend...always... " have a fun !")

Nataaaaan

come on darlin, hear me darlin.

The worst.

My breath is the worst.

The best.

My core is tight.

The middle.

Springtime is cold right now, but not as cold as the winter.

The solid.

Jo Malone fragrance.

The most fun.

Planning plans.

i shouldn't have left that message on the phone.

Its silly of me to continually put these pictures up, but it sorta lets you in on my aesthetic needs. I do like provocative ads, so anyway, its here to look at, and...........juvenile as they are, they are what they are. sorry boys.

So, the lack of posts generally speaks to the challenges right now. Feelin sorta blue, or at least powdery....not sure why, other than basic complacency. For the past two Saturday's we ended up going out.. late night..and it sorta makes me feel bad, makes me feel out of control in many ways...and at risk in many other ways.

At some point I feel like we have to make a break of doing those sorts of things, of getting back to basics and finding our center...but maybe it's not a "we" thing, maybe it's something you do on your own...which is challenging to think about, figuring out how one might go about that. This Saturday we'll be out again, late. Not too excited about it, but everyone else seems to be, so what the hell.

The better part is that Friday night will be great. Old friends coming for a visit, and in many ways we'll be going back to basics.

When we first moved to Philly we only knew a handful of people. Which was enough. We ended up having a game night every week with about 8 people, and it was great. This friday we re-engage the game night. ends up being yelling and obnoxious behavior, but good times regardless.

And yes Mika came out yesterday. Madame Mika. Good stuff. I had a lot of the songs already, only one i don't' like. The rest rock. The big girl song is ripe !!!!!

going running today outside, totally looking forward to that....gotta get that groove back. I began to get so so bored of cardio inside.

see ya later kids.

wake up tangled in the sheets

In it to win it.

Justin Chambers.
Good Morning.
How are you?
I am good too.
Thanks for axin.

nothing going on. really at all. Except that my favorite Work pants went on sale at Banana Republic today. That makes me happy. Also, the weather is good....

The other day on the way to work, this man got on the train at the same stop as I. I was thinking that he was acting odd while waiting for the train. Sorta dirty looking and strung out a little bit. Well, we get on the train and he sat rubbing his little man and stroking it.....not looking anywhere, eyes closed.....strokin....for a long time. It was so so alarming, and i feel like i've seen it all, but it was just wierd man.
eventually i got up and moved....and then i felt like an old grandma shaking my head sayin "the nerve of him"...........dirty dirty dirty.

Anyway, have somethings coming up for the weekends, my dear old friend Dan O is coming from DC for work and i get to have some catch up time with him next week too.
Our roomate is moving out, so we're currently looking for someone else.....slow process and annoying process.
Anyway.
bye !!!!!!!

everyone is waiting, everyone is here

Imagine my surprise when waking on New Music Tuesday. I live for this day. It's the first thing i do when i wake up, besides complain about being tired and grumpy and cold....but thats another post. Tuesdays introduce happiness for me, sometimes, other times i get very, unreasonably upset if i can't find New Music, on New Music Tuesdays. At any rate, yesterday when waking and running into the computer room I thought I was getting Mika's tracks....come to find out it comes out next New Music Tuesday.....but, zoot alors, i find something better. Not one, but two New Music entries to my taste, intoxicating levels of happiness have been present since yesterday.
Tracey Thorn ( Out of the Woods) - Her new cd is off the charts man. Love it. Mark my words, a song called Grand Canyon....it's going to be either a dance floor smash or even bigger in the mainstream.
Chantal Kreviazuk ( - I have been tooting her horn for a long time, she's just amazing, canadian and phat. You'll love it, maybe. It's sorta specific, but she is great.
Thats all for right this second. More later maybe.
I am in such a good moood today, not too sure why, but it just is. and thats makes me happy.

Nateyyy

beautiful disaster

So, I was watching the wrap up of the South by Southwest Music Festival and saw this guy perform....Jon McLaughlin. Wowza, he hawt !!!!!!! His music ain't half bad either.....check him out, his myspace has some songs on it.

when your at a fork in the road

 

hit it

 

this time i'm not only getting, i'm holding....

<

seven

ummm, i was in my dental office this week and this was in one of the mags laying around. Oddly enough I was looking on the net and found it. In case you needed a little

ugga wugga wig wam.

so - per Perez Hilton, I was directed to the Wreckers. A few years ago I was really diggin Michelle Branch, really was. And then she sorta went *poof.

Well here she is with a some other chick, singing what they have labeled country, but ...not really. It's good, and this one song, it's just apropos. and it's large, and hopeful. I'm lookin for a little hope right now, so, me and this song, we go together. Leave the Pieces.

You're not sure that you love me

But you're not sure enough to let me go

Baby it ain't fair you know

To just keep me hangin' 'round

You say you don't wanna hurt me

Don't wanna to see my tears

So why are you still standing here

Just watching me drown

[Chorus]And it's alright, yeah I'll be fine

Don't worry 'bout this heart of mine

Just take your love and hit the road

There's nothing you can do or say

You're gonna break my heart anyway

So just leave the pieces when you go

Now you can drag out the heartache

Baby you can make it quick

Really get it over with

And just let me move on

Don't concern yourself

With this mess you've left for me

I can clean it up, you see

Just as long as you're gone

Hey does anyone have the lyrics to cazwell's songs? just curious. I want to rap it out like him.

talk to you soon.

nate

i can give you everything i've got

What a nut crasher. It's going to snow tomorrow. That hurts man.
Big F U to mother nature right now. sorry. but my pussy willow dries up when the snow comes back after 70 degree weather.
Move it or loose it.

My dear dear kevin has kept me up the last two nights with a hacking, sawing, gunshot cough. As a result i wake in the morning with such a scowl i can't stand myself. Tonight I will be proactive, we'll be sleeping in different rooms. Thats that.

I ate a soft pretzel today.

you'll never know.

We attended something called The Red Ball on Friday night, it's a black tie affair for the American Red Cross....
The theme was "Red Cross through the Decades"

the lovely ANdrew Sisters.-
can't blow a note without the bass and guitar playin with him...

OHHHHH, and

Ana had her baby today. Stella Helen. Welcome to the world l'il Stella.

Scary Painting, Right?

one wally says to the other wammy

i'm feelin a little green.
and mean.
and dayrunk

scream my name loud as you ride it

I just sorta discovered Cazwell. And i am happy about that. Check him out.....dirt, to the ee. Me likee.
Anyway.
Today i got two crown lengthenings done to my mouth. and it hurts like shit. I mean, I took some medication to help with the "pain", but it still hurts. From what I can tell the wonderful dental dude cuts my gums and then drills away at the bone of my tooth? And what he's trying to do it make more of my tooth exposed so that when i get my crown's put on, they have something to stick to. And it sucks. And i hate it. Sorry. I do. Then they stitch my mouth back together in four different places, which also causes me to gag constantly..not to mention not really being able to eat. No worries though, they say that if it continues to bleed to put a wet tea bag on my gums.???

In other news, my love affair with Mika continues. Discovering some new songs, here and there. Some other world.
Good stuff.

My gym days have been not as consistant as i'd like, life getting in the way and everything. I must, I must get more regular. Since people started to comment on how cut i was getting (i know..gag) I have a new fear...loosing that muscle that i built. I swear nicole. It never ends. But this post has. Good night boys !

It's all in the hands of a bitter bitter man - Mika

meet me in the back

through the looking glass

often. many times. I find myself staring in the mirror. Kevin says it's because I lack any self confidence, because i need to get "help". I say it's because I like what I see.
Most of the time.
Then sometimes, when I make bad decisions, eat a lot of soft Philly pretzels, or when a shirt doesn't quite hide that little protrusion round my tummy....those times I take time to stare a little more and be more critical. And I think thats a good thang. Promotionally you have to be critical to make change.

Last year, at this very time...maybe a few days off.......some things happened that caused me to stop and take one hard mother f*(#$ing look in that there mirror. It hurt alot. Shit....who am i kidding, that mirror, as well as my sanity, cracked right down the damn middle....and then off the side - and then spiderwebbed until I was unrecognizable. (if you've no idea of what i speak, read the archives...it's in there)

So strange that in the same week of the year...this year....things have shifted, the planet tilted, just enough to make me stop and explore. To make sure this life I am living is the one I want. Is my current invention the one i want it to be.
Maybe....but ....well the point of all this ????
Rambling I guess.....or trying to deliver a message....be what you want. Stand up for what you believe. It ain't easy, but it's well worth the try. I bump into these moments a few times a year. I guess I am grateful that this year it's not as a result of some pile of shit i stepped in.
Nate

is it any wonder?

A kick in the teeth. Monday's have become just that. A kick in the mother f^&*ing teeth. Today has fallen into the same path as past Mondays....and it's half over. Good news man !!!
So the weekend was full, of good and of bad. The service was on Saturday morning at 10am for Tony. This followed a Friday night Scissor Sisters concert. which was good, not great, but good. The service was amazing and beautiful and sad.

Saturday night we went to Buck's County for a big dinner party for a friend's birthday, and we spent the night up there. Sunday we looked for suits. Yes, dressy suits...i am at that age where i should have a few, that i love. I have one, that i hate. This Friday night we have a black tie affair....which I have yet to figure out what to wear to. So yesterday i found my body to be not where i need it to be, in order to stand in mirrors and pinch and prode. Kevin found a suit. I did not.
Oh well. it's all good. right?

As you could prolly tell this week has been very full, and in so many ways, emotional. One of the most visible men in the Philadelphia community left us. All in all, it's hard to make this make sense. And always is hard, i know that.
So many people before me have said this, but it makes you hold those closest to you a little harder, makes you smile a little brighter, and reflect a thousand times over. Life is short man and never, ever predictable.....either positively or negatively.
In that vein....I have taken many seconds this week to pause and just blankly look at my life. A scary thing, indeed. And an amazing thing as well. I know his life was equally amazing, and that is what i choose to celebrate....to inventory.
Have a good weekend people !!!! and Smile.........

IN LOVING MEMORY

TONY SPARACINO